Unexpected Snowball Fight
by Zeraphic Triomis
Summary: What would happen if you handed a certain droppy eyed monk a snowball when he's in pissed-off mode? Rated P13 due to overuse of BAD WORDS. :gasp:


A/N: Heyouz! Tis my firstest Saiyuki ficcy! It's going to be a one shot thing. :lifts hands in the air: I actually made this a while ago. I found it one day and I forgot how much I cracked up whenever I read this so, I wanted to share with you some examples of what kind of randomness I write! Whooooo!

Disclaimer: All Saiyuki characters belong to Minekura Kazuya-san and not me. :snort:

The village Sanzo and company was staying at had been on the alert because a snow storm was coming in. Everyone had taken shelter early in the evening, as the storm slowly began sprinkling little bits of snow one at a time. Throughout the night, huge gusts of wind blew the snow towards the village's direction. The wind caused loud creaking noises throughout the house, making it quite difficult for the gang to sleep through the night peacefully. At dawn, the storm had died down, creating about 3 feet of snow.

Inside one of the houses, Goku had been really excited about playing outside in the snow while Sanzo thought otherwise. It was too cold to be playing out in the snow, however, kids from the village didn't seem to be disturbed by that at all.

Goku pressed his face against the window, smushing his face all around. "Hey! HEY! Look how deep the snow is!"

Hakkai appeared and looked out the window. "Indeed it is!"

"Sweet," Gojyo said, leaning on the monkey's head.

In the back, Sanzo sighed loudly and continued reading his newspaper. "And just one second ago… the weather was like… extremely hot…"

"Oh Oh!" Goku happily exclaimed. "I wanna go out and make snow angels!"

"I can make snow cones later!" Hakkai smiled.

"Screw those!" Gojyo grunted. "Let's have a snowball fight! Whoever loses… SUCKS!"

He grinned to himself as Goku stomped his foot hard on the ground. "Aww! But Hakkai _always_ wins at stuff!" he whined.

"BUT! If we team up… maybe he'll lose!"

Hakkai smiled and pointed up. "Ah, but two against one isn't fair," he looked at Sanzo who seemed uninterested about their little argument. "Sanzo! Why don't we team up toge-"

"No," the droopy eyed monk interrupted, readjusting his newspaper.

Goku waved his arms around. "Aw.. c'mon Sanzo! Don't you wanna see who sucks more in the snow?"

The monk remained silent.

Gojyo snorted and folded his arms across his chest. "Hey look everyone, Sanzo sucks!"

Everyone snickered at that. Sanzo, who just about enough of his youkai friends, quickly grabbed his trusty gun and shot just above Gojyo's head. Gojyo's eyes widened at that as he slowly slid to the ground. The pissed off monk stomped his foot on the ground loudly.

"FINE. Let's have a frickin' damn snowball fight if it'll make your shitty little selves satisfied!"

"… eh… what you said," squeaked Gojyo.

Everyone dressed up in their proper winter clothes and made their way outside, finding a perfect place to have the best snowball fight ever. After picking teams, it was Gojyo and Goku versus Hakkai and Sanzo. Gojyo and Goku started making their snow forts while Hakkai and Sanzo started making snowballs. After watching how Hakkai made the perfect snowball, Sanzo took a clump of snow and squeezed it tightly, causing the "perfect snowball" to turn into the "perfect slushball." The monk growled and threw the slushball at Hakkai who smiled at that.

"This is so frickin' STUPID," growled Sanzo.

"But, you agreed to do it!… and that's really cold!"

"We should be killing each other! What's going on over there!"

Hakkai peeked over his shoulder and spotted Goku and Gojyo making the finishing touches on their fort.

"They're building a fort!"

"….and we're not!"

"It's best to have our weapons ready before we-"

"NO!" the monk yelled out loud, causing Hakkai to back away from his really pissed off friend. "WHY ARE WE GIVING THEM TIME TO PROTECT THEMSELVES? LET'S KILL THEM ALREADY!"

"S… Sanzo… san?"

Meanwhile… on the other side of… Really Pissed Off Monk Land, Gojyo and Goku stare at their finished fort.

"… our fort sucks dick," Gojyo said, poking Goku on the head.

"That's 'cause you keep flattening out the front! It doesn't need to be!" the monkey retorted back, slapping Gojyo's hand away.

"But it looks like a dick if it's not flattened out!"

"HEY! I thought of the fort idea so… DO WHAT I SAY, YOU PERVERTED KAPPA!"

"Well, well! Someone sure is acting shitty today…"

"I'll show you shitty!"

Goku suddenly pounced Gojyo to the ground, grabbing snow from behind him. He quickly poured snow on his friends' head.

"Brain freeze!" the monkey said victoriously.

Gojyo waved his arms around. "Mpfh Mpdh!"

"What? I can't hear you!" Goku snickered.

"Mpd Mooouuu…." (Why youuuuu….)

Gojyo suddenly broke free and immediately tackled the monkey to the ground. He then stuffed snow into Goku's mouth, laughing evilly as he did so.

"SWALLOW, DAMNIT! SWALLOW!"

Goku waved his arms around helplessly.

A snowball suddenly whacked Gojyo on the back of his head. He quickly turned around, spotting a rather beserky looking Sanzo. Goku lifted himself up with snow still in his mouth.

"Mpfzo?" (Sanzo?)

Sanzo stomped his foot on the snow, now holding a lot of snowballs in both hands while Hakkai is only holding three.

"LET'S GET THE DAMN FIGHT ON ALREADY, DAMNIT!"

"C… calm down, Sanzo-san!" Hakkai said with a shaky voice.

The monk got into a ready position, and threw hundreds of snowballs at his opponents. "SHIT THIS!"

Goku's mouth widened as saliva drips down from his mouth while Gojyo remained in one spot, not quite sure what to do at the moment.

"… ah… shit."

In an instant, the snowballs collided with Goku and Gojyo, burying them deep under. Sanzo continued his beserky snowball throwing until there was no more snow left in his area. He soon turned to his normal self and took out his newspaper, (… where'd he get that from…?) and walked away.

"… ha?" Hakkai smiled to himself, quite shocked at the moment.

Gojyo and Goku, still stuck underneath the snow, mumble, "Mpfhf Mskfj!"

At that, Sanzo quickly turned around with a creepy looking face on. "What was that!"

The two pause. "… mpdhing…" (… nothing…)

* * *

A/N: And… THE END! Aha! This was fun to write… :clenches fists: Hope you enjoyed my randomness and please leave ze review! 


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